Top Medical School Memories

Today I officially completed medical school. I have been feeling a little nostalgic and wanted to pass on some of my favorite memories from the past four years. Some were funny in the moment and some are enjoyable only now in hindsight, but I laugh whenever I think of these moments. Some are probably not funny at all but experiences that have stuck with me. While they are a reminder that there is a huge learning curve in medical school I take great comfort in the fact that in 10 days I will receive my medical degree.

Some of these aren't PG because medical school wasn't.

• On the first day of Gross Anatomy lab we unzipped the body bag to our cadaver Glenda (our name for her). She was nothing like I expected (for some reason I was imagining an embalmed body, not one that had been bathing in formaldehyde for months) so I stood in silent horror wondering how I was going to touch her let alone dissect her for 4 months. One of my partners (who is now one of my closest classmates) processed things completely differently and wouldn't stop talking to me while I sent her silent vibes to be quiet. We still laugh when we talk about our impressions of each other based on that first experience together.
  
• We had some problems with a couple of our cadavers so new ones were shipped from Indy and the delivery man left the cadavers in their body bags just sitting in the quad on Notre Dame's campus outside of the building. Needless to say it drew a lot of attention.
  
• On our last day of Gross Anatomy we had to dispose of the remains of our cadavers and clean the lab. Let me just say it was the nastiest experience. Afterwards (before showering) we went to the grotto and lit candles and "prayed" for our cadavers. Then we went out for pizza (again before showering) with the physicians. It was an interesting day.
  
• In my first meeting with an attending who was to teach 4 of us the basics of the physical exam he used a really lame analogy and I couldn't stop laughing as he re-referenced the analogy. I was intimidated by him and felt horrible, but I couldn't get over the analogy. He eventually stopped talking and asked what I was laughing at. I told him honestly that his analogy was a little lacking and that started a friendship that has lasted through med school. I have worked with him for many months, am publishing a paper with him, have exercised with him, gone out to coffee with him. He has encouraged and challenged me in ways no one else has (including a long lecture on the fact that I need to find a husband soon).
  
• When we were learning the female exam a lady came to be the patient whose sole job is to teach med students all over the region how to do the pelvic exam. She literally has 20+ pelvic exams done on her in an average day. (Remember that if you ever feel like your job is bad). We were talking with her afterwards and she said, "I feel much more comfortable talking with you guys when I am in the stirrups." We looked at each other in horror.
  
• While learning the male exam with another actor patient the medical school thought it would be appropriate timing to have a photo shoot for their fundraising campaign. Of course they came in while I was beginning the exam. Let's just say it was a little awkward.
  
• One day we had to drive to Gary, Indiana for a practice session with actor patients. I was really sick, but I didn't have a choice in participating. While interacting with one of the actors I was smiling a lot because I kept coughing and sneezing and blowing my nose and it was ridiculous. She was trying to pour her heart out about this fake scenario and I couldn't keep it together. Needless to say during the feedback time she literally yelled at me for my lack of compassion, professionalism....
  
• During my obstetrics/gynecology rotation I was sent into a room to do my first cervical check. The room was very dark and I was going in blindly. I put my finger in the wrong orifice and immediately knew I wasn't where I was supposed to be, a fact the patient quickly pointed out. I tried to pretend that I knew what I was doing as I stuck my contaminated finger in her "sterile" cervix to conduct the exam. I knew ob/gyn wasn't for me.
• On my pediatric neurology rotation my evil attending yelled at me in front of a small child and his parents for not conducting a proper neuro exam (I did what every other physician does and used my stethoscope head as the reflex hammer). She literally lectured me every chance she got for the next 3 days on the need to be prepared every day of every rotation with all of the required equipment. So for those 3 days I had every piece of neuro equipment imaginable in my overstuffed white coat pockets. It was priceless but admittedly very passive aggressive.
• During my first day of forensic psychiatry they gave me a razor and told me to help this lady shave. I knew that she had recently killed her husband in a psychotic rage so I just stood at the door ready to run if she tried to make a move on me. I thought my life had reached a new low.
  
• One late night on internal medicine my attending was giving me a really hard time in front of our entire team of residents and students. He had been giving me and the other student a hard time for 2 weeks and I snapped. He asked me if I understood what he was telling me to do and I said, "Obviously I don't get it or I would do what you are asking." It didn't go over very well. I received multiple lectures from him on the need to control one's emotions but by the end of the rotation he was impressed enough that he told me I should strongly consider internal medicine.
  
• On an important surgery rotation I was working with an attending that I needed a good letter of recommendation from. I apparently was doing something wrong in the OR and he yelled, "You still haven't learned the one thing I wanted you to gain from this rotation!" If only he had told me beforehand what it was that he wanted me to learn. Thankfully I impressed him enough to get a really good letter.
• While talking with a patient a few days before Easter about what he needed to do to make sure that the life-threatening problem he had experienced wouldn't happen again he yelled at me, "You're treating me just like the Jews treated Jesus. No one wanted to take responsibility for him." I wanted to enter a theological debate with him, but knew that he wasn't rational enough for such a discussion. I'll think about this as I spend time in Israel.

These have been four of the hardest and best years of my life. I never knew it was possible to put in the hours that we have and I am more and more convinced that I am doing exactly what I was made to do. I am only able to laugh at some of these stories because I have been encouraged and affirmed by many surgeons that I am capable and qualified to become a surgeon. I've got an intense 5-10 years of training left and I only hope I can continue to laugh at the inevitable moments of stupidity that I will have. In the meantime I have two months of vacation to enjoy!